Showing posts with label Thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Thoughts. Show all posts

Monday, January 29, 2007

Heart

It's funny how last night, Kelly kept repeating a joke which I think no one got at all. And she never alluded to it; except to hope that those who has ears, be able to hear the message clear. I don't know if anyone ever did. Even I didn't get it till I got home.



Yeah, we are the Cuba Gooding's of the Call Center industry, all right. And we are the butt of her joke for not realizing that before Cuba Gooding was "shown the money," he showed his heart. A trip down memory lane might jog a few memories...



JERRY
     Look.  I'm happy to entertain you, as always, but I have a question for you.  Are we really "friends?"

TIDWELL
     Why not --



JERRY
     Well, friends can tell each other anything, right? If we have our "friends" hats on --

TIDWELL
     (wary)
     I think so.

JERRY
     (intense)
     Airight.  Here's why you don't have your ten million dollars yet. You are a paycheck player.  You play with your head.  Not your heart.  In your personal life?
     (points)
     Heart. But when you get on the field -- Jerry (finger rises to Tidwell's head) -- you're a businessman.  It's wide-angle lenses and who fucked you over and who owes you for it. That's not what inspires people. I'm sorry, but that's the truth, can you handle it? Just a "question," Rod.  Between friends.

TIDWELL
     I don't want to be friends anymore.

JERRY
    Fine.

TIDWELL
    Beautiful.

JERRY
     (angry)
     We still having dinner in L.A.?

TIDWELL
     (anqry)
     Only 'cause my wife likes your wife!
                  



                    Jerry exits.  Tidwell is pissed.  And hurt.

TIDWELL (continuing)
     "No heart."  "No heart?"
     (yells after him)
     I'm all heart, motherfucker!

                         He gets on the bus. (end)



And so will I. Let the crybaby's of the world gripe about how they don't have their lovin' and their "respect." I'll earn it the old fashioned way.



No heart? Dig this for your heart: (an exposition too long...)


Sunday, July 2, 2006

Posts

My two posts from another forum:



Is English The Key To Being Globally Competitive?



To be "personally" "globally competitive" the answer is, yes, we need english. Those trying or are going to work abroad would definitely need english to be competitive with other nationals looking for the same work. But for our nation to be "globally competitive?" I don't think learning english alone can give us that. How long have we had a large percentage of our population able to speak or at least converse in english outranking other country's percentage of their population? And have we any to show for it?
Meanwhile the Japanese did it without even a hint of Ingrish in them. The Chinese and Koreans? Only now have they desired to learn the language, not to be globally competitive (coz they already have been globally competitive way before they decided to learn it) but bec. they don't want to be fooled/swindled when they deal in business transactions (that require English to be the medium of transaction) The Chinese even going further to impose their "ignorance" of English to others as to force the Americans to learn Mandarin.
Just look at that! If you can command that respect, you don't have to learn their language, they learn yours! Or they hire an interpreter. Either way, if you are in demand, language deficiency is not a problem but jz a bump in the road.
As some Chinoys say: if you want to be an employee anywhere in the world, go learn english. But if you want to go into international business and be the boss, go learn fookien and mandarin.



What we need is to learn to love ourselves first before we can even think of going global. It reeks of hypocrisy, wanting to learn a foreign language when you can barely speak fluently in your own tounge. (and jz look at me, more fluent in english than in tagalog. sheesh!)



Brain Drain, Hope Of The Phil's Economy?



Brain drain or service export?
Before, when medical professionals weren't leaving in droves yet, it was jz service export. Mga DH lng and blue-collar workers and umaalis. Then, it wasn't more of a "brain-drain" but more of a "brawn-drain." IMHO, although this exodus of Filipinos bring to us some "benefits" the over-all and long-term effects are far more harmful than good. In what way?
First: with breadwinners leaving their families (either Nanay or Tatay) the kids are left-alone (or with relatives) to fend for themselves. This creates a void in the family. Disciplining and teaching the kids proper values are left to others, or worse, are jz left alone to be influenced by television and radio. The family is the basic unit of society, and if that is wrecked, what can you expect of those who come from it?
Second: at the rate the exodus is going, it's not impossible that within 10 years, the Philippines will be reduced to a mass of dregs. (dregs- latak. tira-tira) with the better teachers going abroad, what can you expect but for the country's education standards to flunk further. Without abled teachers teaching would-be teachers, future teachers would be more and more inept at teaching. It's a vicious cycle. The product of those inept ones become further inept, and the products of their products becoming complete asses. Imagine that happening not jz to education majors but to every student in the Philippines.
Third: not all who leave the country will come back and invest here. Only a small percentage of them would feel patriotic and say: I will come back and help the motherland! A larger part of them would become immigrants and totally forget the place of their birth, taking their kids and every relative they can possibly take along with them. So aside from the OFW who left, another percentage of the Philippine's future is gone along with them.



At ang natira sa Pilipinas ay ang mga walang alam, ang walang kakayahang mangibang-bansa, ang mga korap, at ang mga kumikita sa koraptong bansang ito.



It is a vicious cycle. Like a man bleeding from a large wound, the heart pumps faster bec. the body needs more blood not knowing that in pumping faster it's making the body lose more blood.
Death would come, sooner than expected.


Monday, May 1, 2006

Self-helping Yourself





For a couple of days now, I have been on an overdrive mode. Writing, writing, and writing. My despair inflamed the writer in me, and ever since, I’ve been chugging out compositions after compositions. My mood hasn’t affected the tone of my articles as I’ve even been able to write funny anecdotes.



When I write something good, I instantly know if it is good ‘coz I really feel good about myself; at how I made that composition turn out. It’s like I have this internal editor in me egging me on when I make one good piece, and slamming me when I write a bad one.



My Mamuy and I have been talking about how I should go about fulfilling my dream to be a published writer. She said that all I had to do was believe in myself and everything would follow.



If it were only that easy.









We went to Powerbooks today and spent the afternoon there sitting at the coffee shop and reading/browsing some books. Actually, we went to the mall to meet my sisters, who texted me and told me that they’d be shopping there at Megamall and asked me if perhaps I’d like to meet them and at the same time, finally get the laptop I’ve been trying to borrow from them. The visit at Powerbooks was just a plus. (Ok, I’ll admit. It’s become routine for me to always visit Powerbooks whenever I go to Megamall)









I browsed some (actually, more than a few of them) self-help books on writing, and was frustrated to discover that Powerbooks doesn’t have anything that really had substance. I mean come on! Most of those books I saw were just of authors having an ego trip and boasting to readers how they got to were they where and all that. I only saw one book that really had some good advice, tips, and useful exercises which I could really make use of. And it was the cheapest lot of them!









I was frustrated ‘coz I wasn’t able to find a good screenwriting book. They only had two touching on that subject. Talk about being low on choices. And both of the books sucked! The one was locally published by a local author, written in Filipino, and the other one by an international shyster. (the locally published book was better than the internationally published one) I was pissed ‘coz they usually call them self-help or DIY books ‘coz their main purpose is to let the reader teach themselves! But how can you do that when all the book does is give motherhood statements, stories of successful people doing this and that, and telling readers commonsense stuff that really, they don’t need to be told, (like: hey you, to be a good fiction writer you need a good plot, strong characters, and memorable dialogues. I mean, c’mon mamon! What writer wouldn’t already know that?) and failing on the stuff that self-help books should give, which are: how to do it, how best to do it, what are examples of this stuff, and finally, a few exercises to get the reader going. Talk about pretentiousness.









Self-help books are a dime a dozen in the US, but only few have the quality enough to be really called “self-help.” For example, have you experienced that frustration when you bought a self-help book only to find out that the only persons helped by that book are the authors themselves? Yeah, they’re self-helping themselves to your money!









Well, I certainly felt like that when I read this book. (title was: PC Annoyances: How to kick them out of your lives forever; or something to that effect) The book had all the right PC annoyances identified. The problem was on the solutions they gave. Every one of them asked the reader to buy (or download) some 3rd-party software which in one way or another, they’re bound to benefit from. Most of the software can be downloaded from their site, or if it was freeware or shareware, was ad-supported through them. The low-life bastards!









Well, anyway, I brought that precious find (entitled: The Word at Work) at the cashier and paid for it. I’ve read most of its contents back at the coffee shop, and had no fear that the book was a wrong purchase. I’ve already known (from browsing it) that it had what I was looking for, and I wasn’t disappointed when I came home and read it fully. Boy, and that book wasn’t even a quarter of the pages of those other pretentious books I saw, and thrice cheaper, too!









So a word of wisdom for people planning to buy one of them how-to, self-help, DIY books: Never buy one which you’ve never browsed beforehand. Go to bookstores that allow customers to read a few pages, or even better, one that actually allows you to read the whole thing! Powerbooks is one such bookstore. I don’t know about Fully Booked. Haven’t been there yet. The bookstore turns me off because from just passing by it, I get the impression that all their books are very pricey. Goodwill Bookstore and Book Sale are good places to get a really good bargain if you’re being thrifty. Though they don’t allow full-time reading, (like you reading the entire book) they do allow casual reading. As for National Bookstore, it depends on what branch you’re visiting. Some branches would allow you to rip-off the plastic (for those books that are wrapped up) and see what’s inside, while others wouldn’t. It usually depends on the kind of manager they have on that branch. Others understand that you’re the kind of customer who just wants to make sure you’re getting a good deal for your money, while others are so stuck-up the only thing they see is the rule book which says: No opening of packages please.









Bookstore owners should see it from the buyer’s point of view. You’re interested in this book they have on display. You’ve read what’s written at the back of it, and it sounded good. You want to see a full itemized list of what’s really inside the book as the book is kind of expensive (most of those wrapped-up books have prices ranging from Php700 up). You ask the saleslady or the person at the customer service counter if you could unwrap the book to see what’s inside. They look coldly at you, act all high and mighty and point at the sign which says: no personal reading please. You appeal to them that you’re not gonna read the whole thing (for Christ sakes, its hardbound, and more than a couple of hundred pages!) and just wanted to see the table of contents. They look at you like you’re some imbecile and smile condescendingly at you and say: sorry sir, pero bawal talaga eh.









Fine. Pakisabi na lang sa boss nyo na wala syang mabebentang libro sa ganyang paraan.









Wanna know what book I was trying to buy? A medical one! And all I wanted to do was see the table of contents (to make sure the topics I need to study are in the book) and see if the pictures and drawings in the book are adequate and clear enough for me to study! Buying a medical book is a considerable investment. It’s not like you’re just buying some romance novel at 50 or 100 pesos a pop. Medical books have prices starting from 1,000 and going up. I’d be fool enough to depend upon the writing at the back of the book, which I’m sure is self-serving anyway (considering it was the book’s own publishers who put it there in the first place), to be assured that my money would be well-spent.









I mean, I can’t get it while some bookstore owners do not realize that they won’t be losing money if they allow customers some personal reading. That’s even good as you’re making them addicted at reading. Yeah, I accept that most Filipinos are free-riders, and given the chance at buying or reading for free, most would choose the latter. But they have to understand that most of the buying-type customers aren’t the free-riding type. They have to realize that most of the buying-type customers are well-to-do and doesn’t really care if they’ve already read the book, (I for one still buy books which I’ve already read for the simple fact that I don’t own one yet) but only care about acquiring a book which they’ve really liked reading, and would want to read again and again. It’s not having read it already. It’s re-reading it that makes it for good buying. You see, those free-rider types aren’t the buying type. Whether they’re able to read the book or not, they’ll never buy it ‘coz: they’re free-riders for Christ sakes! Either they’ll just wait for a friend to buy one, or wait for an online copy of that book to proliferate.









Powerbooks is a good example. It has become a virtual haven for free-riding readers. But do you see them losing money? On the contrary, their business is even growing! They know that those free-riders, would sooner or later, get so addicted at reading, they’d become more than just mere book readers. They’d become book lovers. And those would become their most loyal customers.









A short differentiation between the two:









A book reader is one who reads a book for the simple sake of reading it. After finishing, the person puts the book away, throws it out, or gives it to someone else; in short, he doesn’t care what happens to the book next. He only wanted what was inside.



Book readers NEVER buy expensive books. Unless they’re ones needed in school, or in their jobs.



A book lover is someone who reads a book for the joy of it. After finishing, he carefully puts the book on his bookshelf, along with his other “favorites.” Some even wrap the book in plastic so as not to have their covers torn. He wanted not only what was inside, but the book itself.



Book lovers don’t care about the price tag. As long as they like the book, they’ll buy it. (they may not have enough money for it, but they’ll save for it)









So among the two, whom would you want as customers: the spenders or the misers?









Well, that’s a no-brainer for me, if you ask me.




Saturday, April 22, 2006

Being Lestat

I'ver read Anne Rice's "Interview..." and "Lestat" long before I realized I actually liked these romantic blood-suckers. My better-half drew out of me my interest in them. Like a lot of things I disliked before and now like, vampires for me has become something which I count as how much Mamuy has changed me.



I still remember how I felt after reading Lestat's story, how that brief glimpse in an immortal's life and psyche made me felt somehow -- connected.



I read "Lestat" long ago, yet it's only now that I truly understand what Lestat was griping about when he said that: the world is a savage garden. If I meet Lestat right now, I'd say to him: I feel you man. I understand why you hate God.



I mean for godssakes, he was given a gift/curse (depending on how you view it) which he did not want, and in which he was able to experience what many mortals were unable to experience. To view man's suffering in the flow of time, to be their predator and share their grief, to have lived a millenia and reached a point where he actually longed for death...



Truly who wouldn't cry out to heaven and say: you made the world a savage garden, for what purpose, you unfathomable prick?



Even Anne Rice's discourse on heaven and earth, the angels, and God's reason for creating man, in her other book "Memnoch," made me feel Lestat's pain more. And yet, when given that choice to either side with God or with Satan, Lestat chose God.



And this is how Lestat's savage garden truly comes full circle.



To have lived his life and know eternity and despair, seen in the eyes of an immortal, the view of the world can certainly one that can be called:  a savage garden. A garden where you can see the most beautiful roses, pick one up, and be pricked by its thorns.



It's the paradox of life. Pain makes life bloom unlike any other emotion we can experience.



---



To see the world in a grain of sand, and heaven in a wild flower



Fuck fate which isn't in your hand, and curse God and his damn power


Thursday, April 20, 2006

Support CineMalaya and Junk MMFF Altogether

I don't understand what the fuss is all about this MMFF "rumor" of "undeserved winers" and "mafia-run" juries. Frankly, I don't give a fuck. MMFF for me has already been an institution beyond any salvation ever since Lolit committed that great scam in the 90's. Everyone knows that year after year, MMFF continues to patronize mediocre films just because they have:



a) big budgets



b)big-time producers or directors or



c) both



For an industry that's needing a much needed boost, it's a big relief that CineMalaya  came to life.



This is where the true salvation of Pinoy films lie. If only people would see that. Already, our indies are raking in international awards that our "big-time" directors can only gawk at. Shame. Just like our medical professionals, our indies are only appreciated "abroad."



Thankfully, with CineMalaya, great young talents are given the chance to show their creativity and be discovered in the process. Even the last placed film in this festival will pussy-whip any best picture the MMFF deems "best." What a sorry ass of mind MMFF judges must have when they'd rather have "Hula mo, Huli Ko" in the roster than "Magnifico."



So I don't understand what the hulabaloo is about. So you didn't win the prize, bohoo. Who cares? Your movie made money at the box-office (thanks to the brilliant idea of protectionism, which I think should be given to CineMalaya and not, pwe, MMFF, which incidentally kills all efforts at excellence and promotes a culture of mediocrity) (and by saying "mediocre" I'm saying MMFF has sunk even lower than that. Hello! Terrorist Hunter anyone?), your talents all earned fat paychecks, and you've just degraded Philippine Cinema to the coldest depths of hell.



Who cares if you never got that stinkin' trophy? It's a piece of trash anyway. MMFF has made sure of that.



TRUE filmmakers don't care about the awards they'll get. They care about the art. They know that recognition comes from the audience, not from a bunch of silly saps who think they know Bergman from Kubrick. Real filmmakers care not about prizes. What's important for them is expressing their creativity and showing people what LIFE is all about.



I agree with Zulueta. MMFF is not a festival. It's a carnival.


Thursday, October 27, 2005

Contentment; Everything Comes Full Circle, Time Repeats Itself

I have reflected, wholly and in part, that my life, though just starting, feels like the life lived by three generations of men. I feel like the wise old man shown in martial arts movies who has lived a long and fruitful life, and gleaned a wisdom only time and experience can give, and who, when asked about something, would just smile mysteriously and reply in cryptic messages that only he can understand.





Always, my peace springs forth from my eternal unrest, my happiness, from deep fountains of sorrow, and my inspiration, from a mix of hope and despair. It is, just as it had been centuries before, a battle of extremes. To find a middle ground, a balance between all these -- to teeter on the edge, yet never fall...





LOVE has been too overused, and has been way past being a cliche to be believable as the central reason for living. Perhaps, the simplest and more believable truth is that CONTENTMENT is the only reason for living. For man never stops desiring, being contented only for a while before thinking up of new things, persons, or events to chase after.



We are then, only as free as our desires would let us.





If you feel as if you are a slave of love, rather than the master of it, as if you cannot bear to live a life without it, then contentment for you is still eons ahead of your time. For only with contentment can there be acceptance of the inevitable -- and with the inevitable comes the knowledge that: everything and everyone is where it and they should be, and that nothing nor anyone is out of place in the universe. For all has happened, will happen, and continue to happen according to plan. And it is not love which is the illuminating candle with which we can view the world truly as it is, but is contentment.



Contentment slows down time, speeds it up, turns it back, runs it forward; contentment will show us all the lives we've ever lived, will live, or ever will live -- and all of them will answer one thing: We are where we are supposed to be, and nothing can change that. Contentment is that water we must drink in order to become immortal.





Fate then becomes not a shackle, nor a force in which we should struggle against, but a guiding hand in which we should draw assurance from. Likewise, faith becomes more meaningful, as the blind trust in an antromorphic God and the self-destructive belief of free-will is replaced by sentient understanding, and acceptance of things we have no control of.


Thursday, August 4, 2005

Dying a good death

There's an emotion we all have which we can never define.
It's not elation, depression, nor simple idiotic normalcy.
It's just an emotion of unexplainable, err, depth.



To demonstrate the depths of this depthness I'm talking about, imagine if you will,  a  well of water so deep that even if you drop a stone in it, you won't hear the sound of the stone dropping on the water, ever. I feel bigger than reality, bigger than a god. I feel as if I could reach down in this depth, reach out, and bring forth a fountain of so much inspiration I can feed every struggling writer alive today. (struggling writer defined as: a writer so bereft of words even lady muse won't visit them)



The power to write, I'm happy to say, is mine again.
No, let me rephrase that.
The power to express myself, is mine again.



After six years of languishing in expiration hell (the complete opposite of the paradise of inspiration), I find myself again gifted with words. My gift being given back by no less than my better whole. She who has given so much to save me from myself, she who has done the "surpassing", not surprisingly, has given me back my soul.



Well, not so much as given me back my soul, but given me a new one. Hers.
And heaven and hell will have no greater fury if I will not appreciate that.
For all of my reminiscence, and my desire to bring back those "wonder years", I have always known deep in my heart that the more wondeful years are ahead of me, not behind me. That the moment I'm wishing for is here.



Truly, fate has me by the neck. Even now, I can feel its shackles holding me back. I've always said it's immaterial to believe in free will whilst believing in destiny. I still believe that. But knowing now how inconsequential we are to fate controlling our lives, I am inclined to at least fight against it, every step of the way.



An image of Tristan appears in my mind, fighting that grizzly bear he spared during his youth, and an indian's voice speaks: 'twas a good death.



Tristan died fighting.
And so will I.


Monday, July 18, 2005

Teachers Are Like Spiderman, Too

            Joseph Landy begins the book with a very appropriate question: Why
teach? Because your parents said so? Because teaching is a profession where you
can sate your hunger for large crowds listening to you? Indeed, why teach? As
if the answer wasn’t obvious enough for those brave few who do decide to become
a teacher, Landy asks again, why teach? And if you answered along the lines of
“financial gains,” then sadly, teaching is not for you. For surely, there are
jobs out there that can pay you better and reward you better (financially) than
a lifetime of teaching can ever match. But that is not to say that teaching has
no rewards, nor any pay. : ) In fact, it can even be more rewarding than any
job you’ll ever have, IF – you love teaching.




Landy gives us teachers (old &
new, and those hoping to be) tips and strategies on how to become a much more
effective teacher. He calls it, “staying alive in the classroom.” Albeit a
picture of a battlefield comes to mind, where generals and commanders alike
(teachers and principals) fall amidst the volley of cannons (student
misbehaviours) and bullets (scathing remarks – of everyone), screaming: until
my last breath!



Most important of Landy’s tips were
these two things. First was his emphasis on continual growth, second his
postscript about teachers having a great power in influencing others and
changing the world. His first advice was more on the
intellectual/skills/knowledge aspect of the teacher. It was an advice on how to
avoid ruts in teaching. In teaching you have to study, in studying you have to
learn, in learning you have to be taught. Never stop learning. Just because
you’ve achieved that post as department head, or perhaps chief executive of
something (CEOs), doesn’t mean you don’t need to study anymore. The more you
have to study further, as the more is expected from you. Likewise, being a
teacher does not only mean you are the only one teaching. It is a two-way
street. Learn from your students, and learn well. For whatever they will teach
you will be a thousand more precious than whatever speck of knowledge you may
have gained in your formal education. Nothing beats wisdom than wisdom gained
from experience.



Teachers are earth-movers. They move
the world in ways unseen. Your students might be tomorrow’s leaders or despots.
We teachers shape the world, and the price for that responsibility is high.
Just imagine if Aristotle had no mentor like Plato, or Plato no teacher like
Socrates, what would the world be like without these brilliant people’s ideas?
What would the world be like if only Hitler was taught compassion and mercy?
What would the world be like if the greatest teacher (Jesus) on earth was never
born?



So an ounce of caution for
would-be-teachers: treat yourselves like a struck match. Handled and cultivated
correctly, your fire can influence others and create a conflagration of change
for the better. Abused and underestimated, your fire can torch down empires and
burn nations to the ground. If we can change the life of one small child, then
surely we can change the world.



MAKE A DIFFERENCE.



Burn,
burn! ‘Coz somewhere, someone might die of cold if you stop burning.


Thursday, July 7, 2005

Destiny and Reality

These are my posts from two different threads. One asking if I believe in destiny, and one asking what is reality for me.



Two things so unlike, yet not really so.



Read on to find out.





For those people saying that we make our own destiny, by destiny's definition alone, how can you make it? When it is defined as: an event (or a course of events) that will inevitably happen in the future. So if it will inevitably happen in the future, how can you make it? Even without you doing anything, whatever your destiny may be, would still happen. This is also the same with people saying that they believe in destiny but they also believe in free will. That is a lot of bull. You cannot believe in two things that means the exact opposite of each other. You cannot have a life where you have free will, and you have destiny. It's only either you have free will, or you have destiny. I believe in the matrix mantra that: free will is an illusion made to control us. It would seem that in our life, we are somehow in control, that we somehow have the choice of what to do and what not to do, or where to go with our life, but the sad truth is: all these "seeming choices" presented to us are mere illusion. As the fact proves that, even before we were born, we have already been encoded with everything that we would be using in our life. Our DNA that determines our physical, mental characteristics, our attitudes and beliefs develop without our concious control. Events in our life shaped it. And we neither choose to be a paranoid jealous wife, or a passive husband. Just like in the case of Neo, it was inborn in him that he would always choose LOVE above any other ideals. Thus when presented with a choice, he always chooses LOVE. In that aspect, free will or choice becomes immaterial. Even your choosing is not important because it is already known what your choice would be. The idea of free will was made to make us believe that we are free. When in fact, fate and cruel circumstance would always rule our lives. I ask this of you, is it your free will now that you are reading this thread, browsing this forum, reading what I have written here? Is it?



Reality is what we perceive of it.
In the confine of our limited senses:
seeing, touching, hearing, tasting, smelling, and thinking
what we perceive and believe as true, is.
How are we to say what is real and what is not beyond what we can perceive?
That we may live in a "matrix world," is immaterial, because we'll never know that for sure.
As a philosopher once said, how are we to know the dream of a dream of a dream?
If one day you woke up from a dream of being a butterfly only to wake up a little later discovering you are a butterfly dreaming you were a man, what would you do?
Would you still believe then the reality of things around you?

What is sure is that we were given with the capacity to think, but that capacity is limited. It could never encompass the vastness of the universe, nor invent another sense of perception not given to us.

What is and what isn't are the same. They're mysteries beyond our grasps.